Never
in my wildest dreams would I have thought
I would ever share this story with anyone,
let alone my family and church family,
as it involves revealing a habit that
I have been ashamed of - wait for this
- for 44 years!!!
I
gave my testimony on this a few weeks
ago during the Alpha Course at the request
of Patrick Wilson, although before I spoke
I had felt it was "small beans"
compared to other people's testimonies.
But do you know what? To me this, my very
own personal testimony, is my very own
miracle "small beans" or not.
I
have battled with the embarrassing habit
of nail biting all my life. It started
at the age of 4 when I started kindergarten
and copied another little girl who had
this habit. My parents couldn't get me
to stop, it continued through my teens
and my Dad even resorted to painting black
paint on any nail I would bite but I still
chewed through at the cost of lead poisoning!
When I reached adulthood I travelled,
worked abroad and spent a fortune buying
false nails to cover up my ugly, chewed
up nails. Sometimes I had enough will-power
to stop biting them for a week or two
but then something would upset me and
off I would go again chewing my nails
and the false ones would be stuck on again.
Nick
and I came to Hong Kong over one year
ago (our 2nd time living here) and I saw
the Alpha Course advertised and went along
and did the Course in September 2001.
That loneliness of something missing from
my life was filled by the knowledge that
The Lord was always there for me and I
learned so much from the course and the
shared discussions with my group. I started
attending services at Union Church and
became a helper in the subsequent Alpha
Courses. I learned to pray much more than
I ever did before and read Christian books
which I bought during the Alpha Courses.
A
few months ago I read Jackie Pullinger's
book "Chasing The Dragon". She
was a remarkable British missionary who
travelled to HK and who ministered to
the desperate people who lived in The
Walled City in Kowloon. She recounted
tales of hardened drug addicts praying
to The Lord to help them come off heroin
and how through the power of prayer many
turned their lives around and went on
to help others. I read these individual
cases of coming off drugs through prayer
in wonder and amazement and then doubt
crept into my mind as to the reality of
this actually happening and I became sceptical.
My
nail biting continued and I saw an article
in the South China Sunday magazine about
a hypnotist who could cure habits. This
led me to ask my Doctor if she believed
a hypnotist could cure my habit and she
referred me to a homoeopath. This lady
counseled me and gave me some homoeopathic
drops to take which were supposed to relax
me and as a deterrent to biting my nails.
Two days and many drops later I was biting
again! I was at my wit's end and feeling
miserable and I remember sitting thinking
"How will I ever stop, what shall
I do?" Seconds later I heard a voice
in my head saying "Have you thought
about praying?" This led me to thinking
"Well why not?" I regularly
prayed for friends and family but forgot
about myself. Straight away I prayed to
The Lord to help me stop biting my nails.
That
was around the 2nd week of September 2002
(I wish I had recorded the exact day now)
and The Lord granted me a miracle. I have
never bitten my nails since I prayed to
Him. A week after my "miracle prayer",
we received some awful news which in former
times would have got me biting my nails
like crazy! Thank the Lord, the bad news
went away and everything was OK but through
any sad or anxious times, I have never
felt the urge to bite my nails. I often
wonder if he granted me my miracle to
show me that miracles have and do happen
and stop me being a "Doubting Thomas"
(after John 20: 24-29). He has also given
me my testimony to share with others and
thereby spread His word.
I
shall never stop praying to thank Him
for my Very Own Miracle. Thank you from
the bottom of my heart Lord!